Potty training - am I just lazy, or are they not ready??

[Milligrace]

They just turned 3 this weekend.
They never tell me if they have to pee (or poo, but I'm not concerned so much with BM training yet) or if they have gone, and they don't mind being soaking wet. They often tell me in the morning - when I'm trying to change them - that they are 'clean', meaning they don't have poo :sigh:

I ask a number of times through the day if they want to sit on the potty - and it's really hit or miss if they will actually sit on the potty. I don't force the issue because I did that once before with nasty results.

They ONLY ask to sit on the potty to postpone getting into bed and whether they actually pee is not guaranteed.

Oh, and we've done the 'go naked' thing for a bit here and there, and they've pee'd on the floor rather than tell me they have to go. They will not let me put big-boy undies on them - we've had them available for over 6mo's! And, to tell the truth, I'm quite nervous for my furniture getting soaked with pee and/or poo with undies.

So, am I lazy by not pushing the issue (not requiring a sit on the potty at regular intervals, not forcing the use of undies, etc...)
Or, given the info I've provided, do you think they really aren't ready and forcing the issue would be more of a hassle with bad consequences?

[carrie22]

I dont have the answers for you as I am somewhat in the same boat! My twins will be 3 at the end of October. I started in June with both. DD took to it right away and is pretty much pee trained. She still has accidents here and there, but does well for the most part. DS on the other hand wants absolutely nothing to do with it. Will actually scream if we put him on the potty; othertimes, he will ask to go potty but never actually does. He has gone naked too and just pees where ever. He also has peed through undies so ???? who knows! If you figure something out, please let me know!

good luck!

[Milligrace]

I dont have the answers for you as I am somewhat in the same boat! My twins will be 3 at the end of October. I started in June with both. DD took to it right away and is pretty much pee trained. She still has accidents here and there, but does well for the most part. DS on the other hand wants absolutely nothing to do with it. Will actually scream if we put him on the potty; othertimes, he will ask to go potty but never actually does. He has gone naked too and just pees where ever. He also has peed through undies so ???? who knows! If you figure something out, please let me know!

good luck!

I do think there is a major difference between boys and girls as far as PT goes - and you've got first hand experience of it. I think boys just can't be bothered with it while girls are so much more in touch with how their bodies feel internally and externally.

:sigh: boys

[virginiagirl74]

I could ask the same question, Jenny! I started with Rachel and Holt in June and I still have no solid results (no pun intended)! I am thinking they are too young yet. (29 months)???

I have tried the naked thing, I have tried putting them on the potty at intervals. They will use it, especially Rach...BM's even! But it is not consisitent at all and lately Rachel has acted afraid of using the potty. DH thinks she wants to please us so much that she can't deal with the pressure. I just don't know.

[SarahK]

My vote would be not ready.

I can't really say for sure though as mine trained in about 1 day just as they turned 26 M (it's been ~3 weeks). We still run around in panties & t-shirts most days - not because they have accidents, but because they don't have the hang of taking down their panties. I never used the 'time to sit down' method unless it's before naps - other than that I have always relied on them to tell me.

I would definitely not try yet if it seems like a power struggle.

[KSMom]

Jenny - there is hope.

I have identical boys that trained the week after they turned three (end of March). Here is my experience and pointers - what worked for us.

We tried in Jan and it didn't work but it wasnt' the boys - I was doing it wrong.

Before I elaborate - my boys didn't tell me when they were peeing in their diapers, they did not care if they were soaking wet. It doesn't mean that they are not ready. The most important thing is that you are ready.

Here's what we did.

1) I told them they are big boys and we don't need diapers any more - (in a really excited tone)
2) We got up in the morning and put on underwear (don't go naked- even now that mine are trained, if they are naked, they will pee anywhere)
3) I didn't ask them or put them on the potty every half hour. That only aggrivates them and its boring if they don't have to go
4) Give them lots to drink - when you see the signs - pee pee dance, holding themselves,etc.... then put them on the toilet.
5) IF they are starting to wet themselves, put them on the toilet - the most important part is that they finish in the toilet
6) lots of praise! We gave one M&M for pee and 2 for poo. Use whatever will motivate your children. They each had a piece of paper taped to the wall with their name, they got to put a sticker on it when they went.
7)Stay home for at least 3 days. (this was the hardest part for us)

My boys each had 2 accidents on the first day and then they were trained.
We wear underwear for naps and they stay dry. We are doing pull-ups at night (we call them night underwear). Although one is trained and the other is dry 5 out of 7 mornings - so we are close.


Keep consistent and good luck!!

[busyFLmom]

Jenny - there is hope.

I have identical boys that trained the week after they turned three (end of March). Here is my experience and pointers - what worked for us.

We tried in Jan and it didn't work but it wasnt' the boys - I was doing it wrong.

Before I elaborate - my boys didn't tell me when they were peeing in their diapers, they did not care if they were soaking wet. It doesn't mean that they are not ready. The most important thing is that you are ready.

Here's what we did.

1) I told them they are big boys and we don't need diapers any more - (in a really excited tone)
2) We got up in the morning and put on underwear (don't go naked- even now that mine are trained, if they are naked, they will pee anywhere)
3) I didn't ask them or put them on the potty every half hour. That only aggrivates them and its boring if they don't have to go
4) Give them lots to drink - when you see the signs - pee pee dance, holding themselves,etc.... then put them on the toilet.
5) IF they are starting to wet themselves, put them on the toilet - the most important part is that they finish in the toilet
6) lots of praise! We gave one M&M for pee and 2 for poo. Use whatever will motivate your children. They each had a piece of paper taped to the wall with their name, they got to put a sticker on it when they went.
7)Stay home for at least 3 days. (this was the hardest part for us)

My boys each had 2 accidents on the first day and then they were trained.
We wear underwear for naps and they stay dry. We are doing pull-ups at night (we call them night underwear). Although one is trained and the other is dry 5 out of 7 mornings - so we are close.


Keep consistent and good luck!!

:goodpost: